Ok it is official Shannen is  a genius. I have written it down so now I have to deal with it. The psychologist giving her the testing has told me that a grade skip will do nothing for her (because she is so far ahead) so she will not recommend it. She has said that “no school will effectively educate her”… and “many of these kids end up quiting school”…NICE just what I wanted to hear. So it looks like we will be forking over an obscene amount of money to pay for her school, a tutor to come to said school, and the John Hopkins program…BLAH. Happy she is smart…but this is just not going to be easy. Oh and the best part is that she informed me that she also most likely has a learning disorder (I will post more on that as it comes) and she is most likely bi-polar. What are we going to do with this kid? She looks so small and helpless when she is sleeping….I just want to protect her from everything. I know there are many other (more sever) things that could be happening to my child but I am just feeling very tired at the thought of managing this for the rest of her childhood. I am trying to just think of her as Shannen and not as this label but it can be hard.

As some of you know Todd and I have been going through a rough time with Shannen lately when it comes to school. We have been trying to convince her school that she needs to skip a grade (at least one) and they have been…less than open to the suggestion (even though they don’t doubt she can do the work). Well we had a meeting yesterday to make a decision (at least that was what Todd and I thought was happening) with us, Shannen’s tutor, Shannen’s therapist, the head of the lower school, and the headmaster. Well lets just say we did not come to a decision. The headmaster (who has not been to any other meetings) thinks we need to really take our time…I have been working on this for over a year and his people have not been addressing thing well.

She has never been educated correctly, she is loosing interest in school, and she is only entering 3rd grade! Their big suggestion was for her to stay in 3rd grade and do the John Hopkins program (great program). So I went to sign her up and looked through the coarse work and she had already completed 1/2 of the 4th grade program for math and had read the books in the 5th grade program…but no 3rd grade is the right place for her…and this is a very accelerated program!!! I am just so frustrated. The only good thing is that the headmaster has agreed to call the specialist to see if we can speed up Shannen’s evaluation (the list is very long and we have been on for almost 6 months). I’m just not sure what the best thing to do is now that they seem to be digging in their heels. I know 3rd grade is not the place for her and I feel like we are getting set-up for them announcing that they are not able to educate her. I just wasn’t expecting such a hard time from a school with such a big price tag.

The really annoying part is that with my other children (who have learning issues) they praise me for my insight into my children and follow my lead on how to best service them. Shannen is a twin and this is making life miserable for her sister as well…her sister is very bright and tested in the gifted range but calls herself stupid because she can’t read Shakespeare like Shannen.

It seems like the school just wishes Shannen would go away….it makes me really sad to see a kid as bright (and vulnerable) as she is get treated so poorly. I don’t think they are meaning to but they are turning her away from learning in school….and that is just sad.

I have been having such a rough time trying to balance my involvement in Shannen’s life. My Shannen is such an interesting person. I always have said that if we were both 20 years old together we would be such great friends….but that can make for a hard time being her parent. Shannen is currently having a rough time with life. She is very bright and is starting to mistrust that the adults in her life are always right. I would be some-what prepared for this if she was 16 or even 13 but she is 7. If she is feeling like this now I am concerned for what the future holds.

I have a hard time seeing my kids in trouble and it makes me want to do something NOW so that they wont have one more second of discomfort. I know that some discomfort is good and will make her a stronger person but trying to find the line between letting her find her own way, her own footing and seeing her will broken is really and truly hard. Things are always interesting with my girls because they are twins and they have such a tight connection. Morgan can always tell when her sister is off and when I need to step in more. Morgan will handle me focusing in on her sister for a while but even I can see she will need some energy soon. I wish I knew how to do this right…how to make sure I give them all they need so that they can be happy and successful.

I have been trying to give the girls some good energy after Collin and Tristan go to bed but it is not always easy. I get tired and need down time too…I guess I have been leaning on their school a little too much and have to realign my time.